You guys know Anne Rice, yes? That person who writes books, down there in New Orleans, who's such a horrible bitch that it made me not want to touch her books with a 10 feet pole, never mind how good they possibly might be (even though they've been deteriorating strongly, but that's beside the point).
Sooooooo... it turns out that this certain Anne Rice is trying to sell her book "Blood Canticle" on amazon.com, like so many authors do. Unfortunately, people have written
negative reviews about it!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!! People actually had the fucking cheek to NOT LIKE this GEM of literature. Knowing full well that this is way beneath her since she's a published writer and read by "intellectual giants" she still lowered herself to write an ardent response to all these uninspired and misinterpreting reviews of her work.
I'm reproducing it here because Mrs. Rice
can't fucking use an ENTER key, so I'm trying to break it up a little to ease reading... But first, this is IT, in its pure unadulterated glory!
[source]
26 of 97 people found the following review helpful: [make that 98, I just voted NO]
***** From the Author to the Some of the Negative Voices Here, September 6, 2004
Reviewer: Anne Obrien Rice (New Orleans, LA United States) - See all my reviews
Seldom do I really answer those who criticize my work. In fact, the entire development of my career has been fueled by my ability to ignore denigrating and trivializing criticism as I realize my dreams and my goals. However there is something compelling about Amazon's willingness to publish just about anything, and the sheer outrageous stupidity of many things you've said here that actually touches my proletarian and Democratic soul. Also I use and enjoy Amazon and I do read the reviews of other people's books in many fields. In sum, I believe in what happens here. And so, I speak. First off, let me say that this is addressed only to some of you, who have posted outrageously negative comments here, and not to all. You are interrogating this text from the wrong perspective. Indeed, you aren't even reading it. You are projecting your own limitations on it. And you are giving a whole new meaning to the words "wide readership." And you have strained my Dickensean principles to the max. I'm justifiably proud of being read by intellectual giants and waitresses in trailer parks,in fact, I love it, but who in the world are you? Now to the book. Allow me to point out: nowhere in this text are you told that this is the last of the chronicles, nowhere are you promised curtain calls or a finale, nowhere are you told there will be a wrap-up of all the earlier material. The text tells you exactly what to expect. And it warns you specifically that if you did not enjoy Memnoch the Devil, you may not enjoy this book. This book is by and about a hero whom many of you have already rejected. And he tells you that you are likely to reject him again. And this book is most certainly written -- every word of it -- by me. If and when I can't write a book on my own, you'll know about it. And no, I have no intention of allowing any editor ever to distort, cut, or otherwise mutilate sentences that I have edited and re-edited, and organized and polished myself. I fought a great battle to achieve a status where I did not have to put up with editors making demands on me, and I will never relinquish that status. For me, novel writing is a virtuoso performance. It is not a collaborative art. Back to the novel itself: the character who tells the tale is my Lestat. I was with him more closely than I have ever been in this novel; his voice was as powerful for me as I've ever heard it. I experienced break through after break through as I walked with him, moved with him, saw through his eyes. What I ask of Lestat, Lestat unfailingly gives. For me, three hunting scenes, two which take place in hotels -- the lone woman waiting for the hit man, the slaughter at the pimp's party -- and the late night foray into the slums --stand with any similar scenes in all of the chronicles. They can be read aloud without a single hitch. Every word is in perfect place. The short chapter in which Lestat describes his love for Rowan Mayfair was for me a totally realized poem. There are other such scenes in this book. You don't get all this? Fine. But I experienced an intimacy with the character in those scenes that shattered all prior restraints, and when one is writing one does have to continuously and courageously fight a destructive tendency to inhibition and restraint. Getting really close to the subject matter is the achievement of only great art. Now, if it doesn't appeal to you, fine. You don't enjoy it? Read somebody else. But your stupid arrogant assumptions about me and what I am doing are slander. And you have used this site as if it were a public urinal to publish falsehood and lies. I'll never challenge your democratic freedom to do so, and yes, I'm answering you, but for what it's worth, be assured of the utter contempt I feel for you, especially those of you who post anonymously (and perhaps repeatedly?) and how glad I am that this book is the last one in a series that has invited your hateful and ugly responses. Now, to return to the narrative in question: Lestat's wanting to be a saint is a vision larded through and through with his characteristic vanity. It connects perfectly with his earlier ambitions to be an actor in Paris, a rock star in the modern age. If you can't see that, you aren't reading my work. In his conversation with the Pope he makes observations on the times which are in continuity with his observations on the late twentieth century in The Vampire Lestat, and in continuity with Marius' observations in that book and later in Queen of the Damned. The state of the world has always been an important theme in the chronicles. Lestat's comments matter. Every word he speaks is part of the achievement of this book. That Lestat renounced this saintly ambition within a matter of pages is plain enough for you to see. That he reverts to his old self is obvious, and that he intends to complete the tale of Blackwood Farm is also quite clear. There are many other themes and patterns in this work that I might mention -- the interplay between St.Juan Diago and Lestat, the invisible creature who doesn't "exist" in the eyes of the world is a case in point. There is also the theme of the snare of Blackwood Farm, the place where a human existence becomes so beguiling that Lestat relinquishes his power as if to a spell. The entire relationship between Lestat and Uncle Julien is carefully worked out. But I leave it to readers to discover how this complex and intricate novel establishes itself within a unique, if not unrivalled series of book. There are things to be said. And there is pleasure to be had. And readers will say wonderful things about Blood Canticle and they already are. There are readers out there and plenty of them who cherish the individuality of each of the chronicles which you so flippantly condemn. They can and do talk circles around you. And I am warmed by their response. Their letters, the papers they write in school, our face to face exchanges on the road -- these things sustain me when I read the utter trash that you post. But I feel I have said enough. If this reaches one reader who is curious about my work and shocked by the ugly reviews here, I've served my goals. And Yo, you dude, the slang police! Lestat talks like I do. He always has and he always will. You really wouldn't much like being around either one of us. And you don't have to be. If any of you want to say anything about all this by all means Email me at Anneobrienrice@mac.com. And if you want your money back for the book, send it to 1239 First Street, New Orleans, La, 70130. I'm not a coward about my real name or where I live. And yes, the Chronicles are no more! Thank God!
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*rubs eyes* Okay this is fucking annoying, so I'm going to break it up into paragraphs, if you'd prefer that. I'm doing this for my own convenience.
( Edited by someone who can use the enter key )*groans* Okay, I don't think there's is too much to be said about this other than... "HELLO? Could your ego possibly be any bigger? How can you breathe under this enormous weight, my God!" So, she's going out of her way to explain to everyone how perfectly ellaborately the novel is created, how brilliantly it all was composed and that true connaisseurs of course understand all this. But the common dumbass that dares to buy and read her books obviously doesn't get it and now she's throwing down her pen with a wail of indignation! AND IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!!!!!!!1111111
Never mind the fact that this whole paragraph is peppered with contradictions such as "nowhere in this text are you told that this is the last of the chronicles, nowhere are you promised curtain calls or a finale, nowhere are you told there will be a wrap-up of all the earlier material", closely followed by "And yes, the Chronicles are no more!"... uhm yes. And did I mention that I think it's really pathetic that she can't even use the enter key? This makes me hope
sincerely that the editors she does "not have to put up with" at least add a doublespace here or there... -.-
I'm not even going to point out all the bullshit she's spreading about her alledged masterpiece... I've got a headache now. Randomly, it amuses me that she insinuates that the 200+ mostly negative reviews may in fact be produced by one or two spiteful individials... yeah right.
Now remember that this person also DOES NOT ALLOW FANFICTION! EVER! Doesn't that make you really love her...? I really wonder why this person ever chose to seek the public light when she so obviously can't deal with a) criticism, b) dissenting views, c) other interpretations of her characters and d) just fannish usage of her stuff in general! Dude...
Even when she was still okay, such as in The Vampire Lestat, the book was riddled with inconsistencies and technical flaws (off the top of my hat, the fact that she has Lestat say at the beginning that his language is still influenced a lot by his ancient upbringing and he might use a strange word here and there, and yet, all he ever does is use "motor coach" or whatever it was for car and that's IT! It never appears again! WTF?). So she really should be used to negative comments by now... -.-
I think this is the good thing about writing in fandom and one point in your life. It brings you much closer to your readers and humbles you in a way, because you quickly learn that not everyone worships the ground you walk on and there are always people who don't like what you do.
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cicer re: that deplorable Harry Potter Fans for Bush wank.
