Of Sherlock Love.

[silversolitaire]

*cries* Oh the love... how much it hurts...

And I don't mean my cat, whom I love dearly. No, I mean the one who stood as his namesake, my beloved idol Sherlock Holmes. Oh the love... it awakes every now and then. And I do love him, dearly. For as long as I can think, ever since I first opened a book Sherlock Holmes has captured me. I love this character, so much. He's everything a man should be and more. He's brilliant, so so smart. He's a geek, he's an artist who plays the violin wonderfully and who cries at the beauty of music. He has bouts of extreme giddiness where he jumps over chairs and runs down the street, where he gushes on endlessly about a book or a play he's seen. And then he has bouts of extreme sadness, where he curls up on his armchair in his room, hidden away from the world, when only his drug can give him comfort. He can be such a klutz when he tries out combining chemical components and ends up blowing up his entire lab. And he's a faithful friend. How I adore him.

I've read all the books over and over again, I've adored the way they were written and in my head Sherlock became alive. He was my idol and I wanted to be around him forever and always. I've drawn him, written about him, I've written cheesy Mary-Sueish stories (oh my God! I'm guilty! I thought I wasn't, but I am! Thank God I've never showed it to anyone *burns the pages). And of course I've involved him into slash stories. He's my dearest gem, how could I not?

Well, of course the love is stronger every now and then. And sometimes it's very quiet. For the longest time it was very quiet. But now it's burning again, like a raging fire... *sobs* How did that happen, you may ask? I've watched something very trivial. A music video with scenes from Sherlock Holmes movies. It moved me deeply. I had no idea who that actor was! I've never watched Sherlock Holmes movies! Isn't that strange? I've just never bothered! And then... I've seen these scenes and there he was... MY Sherlock! Just like I've always seen him. Handsome, young, ailing, sad, hyper, brilliant, emotional, retreated... my Sherlock... I went off to research and found out that it was Jeremy Brett! The legendary Jeremy Brett who is said to be one of the most influential Sherlock Holmes impersonators of all time. How could I have missed him? And the urge awoke inside of me, this hunger... I must see it, all if it, every movie in existence! I must revel in the beauty that is my Sherlock... now. The urge was so strong that I wanted to cry. I still want to cry. *covers face*

I found out that the complete DVD set is available at amazon.co.uk [even worse, play.com had it available within 24 hrs! I even had it in my shopping basket already! Oh help me God!]. Everything I need. But it's so expensive... 120 pounds! *shakes head* I could probably buy it once I got paid, but I'm notoriously broke... And my parents wouldn't understand it. Of course they wouldn't. They'd say "Why on earth do you spend so much money when you always say you're broke?" And of coure my dad would get mad and demand I pay the repair on my car myself when he said he's going to help me now. It wouldn't be fair. I see it, yes... But I can't stop thinking about it. I want it so badly... T_T *curls up*

Isn't it horrible? It's my birthday in less than two weeks and I have not even an inkling of a chance of hoping that I'd get this. Just because my parents never give me such expensive gifts... I hardly ever get something I really want... ;_; I always have to buy everything myself. And now I can't... the pain... I need more money T_T. *cries more*

I shouldn't be like that... but I can't control it. I'm addicted to Sherlock Holmes... I need to distract myself... somehow...

Comments

[kmazzy.livejournal.com]

awww honey. i was going to ask you what you want for your birthday! but i don't think i can afford that either! but i don't want to give you something you don't really want. maybe i can send you some money to put towards it or something?

[silversolitaire.livejournal.com]

Meow! *hugs* You're too good... but I don't think I could accept this. And you always give me stuff that I really like. I was talking about my parents specifically.

[heidi-gamgee.livejournal.com]

Hurrah, a Sherlock Holmes fan! I've seen many episodes of the BBC Sherlock Holmes series with Jeremy Brett, and it's fantastic. He has this wonderful nervous energy that's dead-on. The series also deals with his cocaine addiction quite a bit. In later episodes, Brett came back after a hiatus and is rather burly...a bit like a football player...but he's still good. ^__^

...my library (here in Canada!) has some of the episodes, so why don't you check out yours?

[silversolitaire.livejournal.com]

Meowy... wanna see... I don't think the library has them. I don't live in an English speaking country and videos are generally not common in libraries either.

Re:

[heidi-gamgee.livejournal.com]

Aw, sorry about that... But you know what? I have a few that I taped off television...they're not the best quality but I don't need them, maybe I could send them to you?? Drop me a line at siddhartha_jan@hotmail.com

[silversolitaire.livejournal.com]

Meow!!! Would you?? That'd be so nice of you... but I live in Europe... that'll probably be horribly expensive... meow.

[heidi-gamgee.livejournal.com]

I'll look into the postage rates, kay?

[silversolitaire.livejournal.com]

Yikes! Now I know what you mean with burly! I watched that music vid again and I thought it was someone else, maybe Moriarti or so, but it was in fact a rather pale and sallow Jeremy Brett! Oh dear... I heard that he was fatally ill at the filming of the last episodes and that it showed... meow...

Did you see most episodes? What's this scene where Sherlock is thrown down a waterfall. I mean, I know how Sherlock Holmes is supposed to "die" in the books, but is that is? I also know that there are so many different versions that brought him back. I read that this particular series tried to set a definite end since Brett was so ill. Is that it? I see Watson cover his face in a sob!

Maybe you want to check out the video. It's here and it's called "Your Mistake". http://www.mindspring.com/~diwillia/hot.htm

Re:

[heidi-gamgee.livejournal.com]

He comes back! They do the whole falling-down-the waterfall thing and it's really powerful, very moving. Come to think of it, that was a hell of an episode. But then they brought the series back, and he's not dead after all.

[silversolitaire.livejournal.com]

I want to see that... ;_;

[fleurrochard]

Hmm, and if you don't buy the whole set but single DVDs? Yes, in the end that'll be more expensive, but it won't be such a big sum at once.

[silversolitaire.livejournal.com]

Mow... that'd be a LOT more expensive...

[krylon-junkie.livejournal.com]

I love him too. Sherlock, I mean. I was always more of a Basil Rathbone fan when it comes to movies. I'm pretty sure Brett has done a few movies. In fact, I know he's done at least one. I think it was called "Sherlock Holmes and the Vampire." It was a new story. Look up his filmography and see what you can find at the libraries or video rental places.

[silversolitaire.livejournal.com]

Brett did countless movies! I know that much now. He did 4 full-length movies and 32 1-hour shows. Otherwise 120 pounds would be quite a lot of money, wouldn't it? ^_^;

I'm not sure about Basil Rathbone. I think I've seen a couple of movies with him and I had my problems with the portrayal of Watson... I may be wrong of course.

[silversolitaire.livejournal.com]

I was thinking, maybe you want to check out the video yourself. It's called "Your Mistake" and it can be found here:

http://www.mindspring.com/~diwillia/hot.htm

I'm playing "Spot the story!" LOL. That's funny...

[kribban.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I know what an obsession is like. Aren't you scared the films won't live up to the books? I also know what it's like to be broke right now... *hugs*

[silversolitaire.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I don't care about the movies being different. They're a seperate entity, and I found myself strangely enthralled by Jeremy Brett so I'm really craving for more... *huggles books* They can't take that away from me, oh no.

[monkeyfruit.livejournal.com]

Waaa.... I know how you feel... I saw the entire VHS set (well, my VCR at home is broken anyway ='() at Past Times T_T I've only watched a few of them and I have two bootleg vcds =(