(no subject)

[silversolitaire]

I wish I had enough strength for anything. but I don't. i wish I wouldn't need people. i wish they wouldn't have the power to hurt me. i wish I could just be by myself and be happy. but i can't. I hate myself, i want to die.... i don't know what I want i wish i could be happy by myself, love myself enough to be alone with myself. then I'd never have to feel so hurt again.

I hate everyone right now... for abandoning me... for making me feel so worthless. how can I be so worthless that someone is willing to hurt me so much over something that's so... insignificant. I just don't understand it. right now I feel like I'm worth less than a piece of paper. why do I bother? i don't know...

need to get drunk... or else I can't sleep. maybe I should try the codeine overdose after all... my drug of choice,. ne? whatever,,,,

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[starla9.livejournal.com]

*joins hug*