Urm... Latin help?

So, for some strange and unknown reason my half-uncle has taken a liking in me, despite the fact that I abhor him and barely spoke a work to him when he visited two weeks okay. I did say to him after he annoyed the fuck out of me for the 50th time that he's superimposing his standards on other people and should know that a hermeneutic approach only works when you share and / or understand someone's cultural background. Guess that left an impression. So, yeah... no clue why he likes me now, but he does because he wrote me an email. Or rather, my dad... on his birthday... without wishing HIM a happy birthday. It was some obscure Mac-format that none of us could open. Apparently, dad and bro tried all day to sorta format it. It was a Chronostichon which he composed to my honor for my 25th birthday! O.o; I mean... how odd is that??? I didn't even know what it was until my dad explained it to me.

So... now I've got a Chronostichon... in Latin. I did study Latin for five years, but my last class has has been 7 years ago or so! I barely remember anything! So I really have no clue what this means. Well I have a faint clue, but not enough to actually stand a chance against him and now I'm expected to call him and say thank you and he'll only make me look stupid ;_;.

Anyway, here is it:

[Name of his place in Latin], die vigesimo octavo mensis Iulii, qui infra indicatur anno.

(I know this! On the 28th of July in the year as indicated below! Which is the trick of a Chronostichon, btw. All the letters that can be read as a Roman number are supposed to add up to meaningful numbers. In this case, of the first part each line adds up to 2003 and the last part the entire thing adds up to 2003. Odd person...)

HERMANN DIGNA SILVERA HODIE,
NON INGRATA EI FORE EPIGRAMMATA SPERANS,
ANTICO MODO CANTAT AC CHRONOSTICHIS.

(Note, I changed my real name to "Silvera", but of course the V is extra there, but it doesn't count. It's just the I that's intended to be in there! ^_^; I still think he messed up the vocative... but what do I know. I must admit, I have no clue what this means... "Hermann tells Silver today..." does he call me an ingrate? LOL... Somehow my grammar has left me...)

QVATTVOR VT ANNI ET SAECVLI TEMPORA,
NVNC TIBI VERE, SILVERA, PERACTO
QVOT SINT VENTVRA DESINE PERCONTARI.

(Okay, this is something about a fourth of a century or so? God I feel so old... The rest... is silence. I have no idea x_x. Those words aren't even in my dictionary. It's probably some obscure grammatical term... meow.)

Okay... this is just too much... *frizzles* Help anyone??

Dogma In-Action Figures!

Bwahaha! Oh my God! They're great! Look!

http://www.viewaskew.com/news/jul03/1.html

Oh my God, I'm dying here! Loki! Bartleby! Metatron! Matt Damon, Ben Affleck and Alan Rickman in Clerks:TAS style! I love it! I gotta have them!!!

Loki
Barteby
The Golgathan! XD
Jay
Metatron!!!!! (just the concept, but still! SQUEEEE)

Little tidbit quote of Alan Cumming

You've called yourself 'pansexual' – but do you ever feel pressure to decide which team you're on?

I don't feel it, but I think there is a pressure to be black or white when most people I think are quite grey. If you're forced to make a decision it cuts you off from a whole legion of experience. And then there's that thing of, "I am this now, so therefore I wear this, I like this ...". When you've been through so much to become gay, why do you need to go back to being a stereotype and go into a gay ghetto?

And have all your cultural tastes defined for you ...

Exactly. Gay culture is so mainstream now. I went to this party last night and I just thought, my God, all these gay men are so tasteless! What happened?! There were no girls there at all. How boring!

No Bette Davis?

Ah, she's always there in spirit. The only girls that were there last night were the scary ones that are more butch than the men. I saw a woman I thought was a man in drag – I was a little drunk. She came over and said hello, and I thought oh, trannies love me. And then I realised she was a woman. Thank God I didn't say how's the world of drag or anything.

[source]

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Amused me! XD