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I found the perfect inspiration. How probable is that... when you are writing about a certain character and zap through the channels, looking for inspiration and you see someone who looks just like the person you had in mind...

That's a good sign!

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I just wish my bro would stop talking to me! ARGH! He's driving me NUTS!

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"Good morning, good morning, it's great to stay up late!"

Ah, what can be more appropriate to start the day than a bit of "Singing in the Rain"? ^_^ I've had a good night sleep. Okay, I'm still dead tired, but that's what you get when going to bed at 4 AM. I love the night time! *_*

The Olympics Finals are on. I don't give a toss about it, really, but I dig solemn stuff. So let's have a looky. I think it's cool that Savage Garden got to sing a song. Although they sorta got lost on that huge platform. That made me think about this question: "If for 30 seconds the whole world was watching you, what would you say?" They said:

"I believe you can't control or choose your sexuality."

Blessed be...

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I just read the most beautiful thing. Yesterday I got a bit confused when somebody asked me, if Jörg had any children since that was said in his info. I couldn't open the site then, so I couldn't find out what it was about. Now I did. And it was so beautiful. Jörg has a female best friend and they lead a relationship "beyond sexual boundaries" as they called it. They said that if they didn't find the right person sooner or later, they'd move in together and maybe have a child together. That's beautiful.

That's what I could imagine, too: having a child with a gay man. I don't want any children, just because I can't stand them. But then there's always the necessity of a guy coming with it, which is also quite annoying. I always enjoyed the company of my gay friends, being queer myself. But just a bit different, you know? I can drool at men just as I can drool at women. I'm the perfect company for them ^_~. And I'm very tolerant. I wouldn't mind a bit if the man I was living with had other men. Why should I? Just like I would continue having my girls. Ah, what a happy family that could be.

They say that gay people can choose their families. I hope it's true..

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I'm still in that solemn mood... how can one not feel that way on such a day? I'm feeling inspired now. I want to draw. But I shouldn't. I *really* need to write that term paper now! *sighs*

But... how can one waste her time on such worldly activities... when the muses take you in your arms and gently rock you... I've seen Sif again today. Sif, who's been haunting me for years. One day I will give you what you want. I promise. I'm getting better. One day I can give it to you.

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So, to honor Savage Garden and their achievement to the les-bi-gay community (be it intentional or not...), here the lyrics to "Affirmation". I'm not really a fan, but I love the words of this song and I think Dazz (?) could be such a beautiful bishounen, if he just tried harder ^_~.

Affirmation

I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands
I believe that junk food tastes so good because it's bad for you
I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do
I believe that beauty magazines promote low self esteem
I believe I'm loved when I'm completely by myself alone

I believe in karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe you can't control or choose your sexuality
I believe that trust is more important than monogamy
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul
I believe that family is worth more than money or gold
I believe the struggle for financial freedom is unfair
I believe the only ones who disagree are millionaires

I believe in karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness
I believe that wedded bliss negates the need to be undressed
I believe that God does not endorse TV evangelists
I believe in love surviving death into eternity

I believe in karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love until you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye

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Why do I always get Tranfer Errors when trying to download stuff from Napster? Why the hell are you people online when you don't want to share!!!

The Mystery of the Silver Bead

It seems to be following me. It's spooky. No matter where I go, I see this tiny silver bead. I've just found it again while vacuuming the floor. It's a tiny hematit bead. I must have found and disposed of it about 5 times already, but it keeps returning. What does it mean?

When I almost died in that car crash last May, I had a hematite with me. As a matter of fact, I escaped death three times in the last two months before and each time there was a hematite by my side. The last time, however, was the closest call. But there was nothing. No near-death-experience, no white tunnel, no nothing. Just pain. I'm feeling cheated, to be honest. And now I'm being followed by a hematite. That's just too weird.

They call it the blood stone. Does this mean anything?

I wonder... is this a sign? Is this thing that's been after me still there? Should I keep the hematite with me? What does it mean? Just what?

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"I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good!"

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Oh-oh-ooooooh!

What do my beady eyes see? Ramona, this woman in Jörg's life. Woah, she's cool! Maybe she's even a sister. Great woman. Just my style. Radiant red hair and a taste in clothing that makes your eyes twist out of the sockets. Orange, purple and pink. *yummy* hehehehe. Good companion for a gay man. She will do! ^_^

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Hahahahahaa... marvelous! Stefanie's sister is just as stupid as she is! Wonderful! *_*

I don't believe a word of what she's saying. That certain celebrities talk bad about her in public, because she reminds them of their ex! LOL! Suuuuuure! She's so great and so wonderful and everybody loves her that they can't look at her without feeling bitter!

Hahahaha, ROFL! My ass!

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"Mischief managed!"

I'm in the mood for a bit of silliness!

This is Walter! Say hello to Walter! Isn't he sugar? What a babe! He's the aforementioned dude from Big Brother Germany.

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Just had a very satisfying meal and now I feel like doing something productive. Bad enough that I didn't work on the paper at all... ´_`:

I've written so much into this journal today already, I feel bad about writing even more. I must be so lonely! LOL!

My girlfriend got back to me! And she wasn't mad at all. *phewy* I was really starting to worried... But she was just busy. *happy sigh*

I feel like musing on Harry Potter again! *g* But that will have to wait until later. I really need to work on that chapter or else my co-writer will have my hide.

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Oh faithful friend!

I really hate the fact that I have to see my ex online on my ICQ list. But somehow I don't want to delete the name. I'm a true masochist, ain't I? To honor these feelings now a bit of so called poetry! *ehem*


You said you loved me

You said you loved me
And I believed your lies and broken promises to be
Because they were so good to hear


I HATE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NOW! ARRRRGH