How bizarre, how bizarre...
Apr. 23rd, 2002 05:25 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
silversolitaireOkay, got my recharger. Took my two hours... T_T Managed to coax my mom into meeting me in the middle. It was rather stressful. Especially since she said I will have to pay for the extra gas now... which sums up to around 20 EUR. Fuck... Well, she might forget about it. When we met at that truckstop, she even invited me to a coffee. So maybe... *hopes*
I'm trying to use less gender specific words now. I dunno... it's weird. I'm feeling kinda male again lately o.o. My male half hasn't come out for quite some time and recently it's just so dominant. Freaky... Speaking of freaky, I had three extremely bizarre experiences yesterday.
First one: I was driving back to my flat and on the highway I saw a truck which was completely made of plexiglas and filled to the top with bald doll heads o.o. I'm not kidding. Event he driver's seat was loaded with it. I have no clue what the hell it was.
Second one: As I was driving in my car, I suddenly felt Cid inside of me again. Okay, this may sound weird to most people and I'm not sure I ever mentioned it before, but I've always had this split personality thing. Almost like hearing voices. Around 2000, there was this guy inside of me whom I named Cid, or maybe it's his name to begin with. I don't know... Anyway, he used to control me a lot then. Made me smoke and behave very male. Haven't heard from him in a while. Yesterday, I felt him again. Very strange...
Third one: Now this was uber-bizarre and I still dunno what the heck was going on. I was sitting on the train. It was dark. I still felt a bit weird. When I looked up, I saw my face reflected in the opposite screen against someone's black shirt. Half of my face was in shadow. It looked so strange to me. As if it wasn't mine. It was a feeling I usually only know from meditation and I haven't meditated for years. As I was watching this strange half-face on the screen, it began changing in front of my eyes. My eyes started to get more slanted and larger, and the shadow under my nose got broader and sharper and my mouth changed too. Suddenly, I looked like a cat! A feline! Something! It was so strange! I just stared, wondering if I was just imagining things, but also afraid to move for fear of making it go away. Then the train stopped and I got out and I felt completely disembodied. I felt like a wild animal, even. My movements were so different than usual, so graceful and smooth. I felt filled with energy and awakeness. I was literally running up the stairs, taking two steps each, and I didn't want to stop! Unfortunately, the feeling soon faded again and I was back to my old self.
Very, very strange... I still don't know what it was...
/Random I like my Vegata!Sexual Frustration desktop. *nods*
Should rake the leaves outside now... dun wanna... *curls up* Sleep...
I'm trying to use less gender specific words now. I dunno... it's weird. I'm feeling kinda male again lately o.o. My male half hasn't come out for quite some time and recently it's just so dominant. Freaky... Speaking of freaky, I had three extremely bizarre experiences yesterday.
First one: I was driving back to my flat and on the highway I saw a truck which was completely made of plexiglas and filled to the top with bald doll heads o.o. I'm not kidding. Event he driver's seat was loaded with it. I have no clue what the hell it was.
Second one: As I was driving in my car, I suddenly felt Cid inside of me again. Okay, this may sound weird to most people and I'm not sure I ever mentioned it before, but I've always had this split personality thing. Almost like hearing voices. Around 2000, there was this guy inside of me whom I named Cid, or maybe it's his name to begin with. I don't know... Anyway, he used to control me a lot then. Made me smoke and behave very male. Haven't heard from him in a while. Yesterday, I felt him again. Very strange...
Third one: Now this was uber-bizarre and I still dunno what the heck was going on. I was sitting on the train. It was dark. I still felt a bit weird. When I looked up, I saw my face reflected in the opposite screen against someone's black shirt. Half of my face was in shadow. It looked so strange to me. As if it wasn't mine. It was a feeling I usually only know from meditation and I haven't meditated for years. As I was watching this strange half-face on the screen, it began changing in front of my eyes. My eyes started to get more slanted and larger, and the shadow under my nose got broader and sharper and my mouth changed too. Suddenly, I looked like a cat! A feline! Something! It was so strange! I just stared, wondering if I was just imagining things, but also afraid to move for fear of making it go away. Then the train stopped and I got out and I felt completely disembodied. I felt like a wild animal, even. My movements were so different than usual, so graceful and smooth. I felt filled with energy and awakeness. I was literally running up the stairs, taking two steps each, and I didn't want to stop! Unfortunately, the feeling soon faded again and I was back to my old self.
Very, very strange... I still don't know what it was...
/Random I like my Vegata!Sexual Frustration desktop. *nods*
Should rake the leaves outside now... dun wanna... *curls up* Sleep...
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no subject
Date: 2002-04-23 09:14 am (UTC)And...that's some weird stuff. O_o
no subject
Date: 2002-04-23 11:32 am (UTC)But since it doens't happen much, and you're back to normal, I guess it's fine. Don't worry about it.
no subject
Date: 2002-04-23 12:43 pm (UTC)