Last night...
Jan. 28th, 2002 09:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
silversolitaireLast night I was out taking pictures for the performance for this club I've been in ever since I was 4 or so. As expected, it was utterly boring. There was this ventriloquist who made fun of me! >_< I took a picture of him and suddenly his puppet turned to me and told me to come closer and forced me to say my name in front of everyone and made some stupid saucy jokes. Like "I think her father must have been a photographer as well, since she's developed so well." Rarrrr!!! T_T I knew this was going to happen. I didn't want to cross in front of the stage for a reason.
The surprising thing was that I was awarded the Great Cross. It's a huge honor and it's given to people who have been in the club for more than 10 years and who have proved themselves to be valuable members. I was gobsmacked, to be honest. Just the night before I had said to Fleur that it's kinda stupid that I'm the only one from the family who didn't get it yet.
I've got a bit of a bad conscience though... Because I didn't even want to go there. Each year, it bores me more. I've grown up there, I've danced in their formations ever since I was a wee child, I've been a dance in those groups until I was 17! I can't imagine how it is without this club and yet it annoys me, the forced joyfulness, how many things are conducted there, how people who've been in there forever and think of themselves as indispensable blackmail others into doing what they want or else they'll refuse to work... all of that.
Being awarded with this medal now kinda gave me a bad conscience... since I've always had such evil thoughts... still do, and always want to run away and only don't manage it because old habits die hard. Ah well... x_x I'm gonna continue design their stuff, their magazine covers and stage designs and all... that'll do, I guess.
The Great Cross looks very nice though... *_*
The surprising thing was that I was awarded the Great Cross. It's a huge honor and it's given to people who have been in the club for more than 10 years and who have proved themselves to be valuable members. I was gobsmacked, to be honest. Just the night before I had said to Fleur that it's kinda stupid that I'm the only one from the family who didn't get it yet.
I've got a bit of a bad conscience though... Because I didn't even want to go there. Each year, it bores me more. I've grown up there, I've danced in their formations ever since I was a wee child, I've been a dance in those groups until I was 17! I can't imagine how it is without this club and yet it annoys me, the forced joyfulness, how many things are conducted there, how people who've been in there forever and think of themselves as indispensable blackmail others into doing what they want or else they'll refuse to work... all of that.
Being awarded with this medal now kinda gave me a bad conscience... since I've always had such evil thoughts... still do, and always want to run away and only don't manage it because old habits die hard. Ah well... x_x I'm gonna continue design their stuff, their magazine covers and stage designs and all... that'll do, I guess.
The Great Cross looks very nice though... *_*
