Sometimes I wonder...

[silversolitaire]

... why I keep going on at all. I just don't see an aim most of the time. I'm not happy. I want to leave. Far away. I finally want to study what I want to. I don't know where I'll end up like that. I'll end up in some stupid office, slaving away, hating my life and suiciding. I've only made mistakes, from beginning to end. I never should have started studying. It was all a mistake...

I will never be able to study in the States. I just can't afford it. There is no fucking way...