What academics really mean

Found this this weekend and in the light of my Master's thesis this seems rather relevant. And oh so true! XD


What academics really mean:

• It has long been known (I haven't bothered to look up the reference)


• A trend is evident (These data are practically worthless)


• Typical results are shown (this is the prettiest graph)


• In my experience (once)


• In case after case (twice)


• In a series of cases (thrice)


• It is believed that (I think)


• It is generally believed that (a couple of others think so too)


• It is not unreasonable to assume (If you believe this, you'll believe anything)


• Correct within an order of magnitude (wrong)


• According to statistical analysis (it is rumored)


• Of great theoretical importance (I find it kind of interesting)


• Of great practical importance (I can get some mileage out of it)


• Typical results are shown (The best results are shown)


• Three of the samples were chosen for this study (the other samples didn't make any sense)


• It has not been possible to provide definitive answers (The experiment was negative, but at least I can publish the data somewhere)


• It might be argued that... (I have such a good answer for this objection that I shall now raise it)


• I thank X for assistance with the experiments and Y for useful discussions on the interpretation of the data. (X did the experiment and Y explained it to me.)


• It is significant (I'm not sure how, but you can probably figure it out)


• Mainstream scholars believe (I'm ignoring everyone I disagree with)


• To put this statement in context (Let me spend five pages detailing my irrelevant historical research)


• Beyond the scope of this essay/study (I don't feel like talking about it)


• Only tangentially relevant (I'm thoroughly sick of talking about it)


• New research has shown (Everyone else is wrong)